At some point in our lives, we all face the harsh truth: we are grown. Grown-ass adults with our own battles, scars, and choices. And with that truth comes a reality that is equally liberating and confronting—we are responsible for our own emotional intelligence.
I know, it’s easier to point the finger. It’s easier to say, “I’m this way because of them.” Maybe you were hurt, betrayed, abandoned, or taught unhealthy patterns. Guess what? Almost all of us have been. Life doesn’t hand out a “Get Out of Trauma Free” card. We’ve all got baggage. But here’s the kicker: What you choose to do with that baggage is entirely on you.
We are no longer kids waiting for someone else to fix us, waiting for apologies that may never come, or hoping for closure that might not arrive. Emotional wounds don’t heal by chance; they heal by choice. By work. By effort.
Blaming others will keep you stuck. Playing the victim will leave you stagnant and bitter. It will rob you of the joy, growth, and peace you deserve. The blame game might feel satisfying in the moment—it gives you an excuse to do nothing. But over time, it turns ugly. You turn ugly, not because of your hurt but because you let it define you instead of transform you.
Growth is uncomfortable. It requires brutal honesty, accountability, and a willingness to break down the walls you built to protect yourself. But it’s worth it. Because growth is where you reclaim your power. It’s where you stop being the person who says, “I am this way because of them,” and start being the person who says, “I chose to heal. I chose better.”
I get it. It’s not easy to admit you’re the one standing in your own way. But it’s necessary. Nobody is coming to rescue you from yourself. So if you’re reading this, let this be your wake-up call. Stop waiting. Stop blaming. Start fixing.
Because at the end of the day, healing isn’t about them—it’s about you. And that’s where your real power lies.
🫰🫂🫖JRT
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